Gaea's monologue
by fangirling bc of you
Summary: Everyone says Gaea is bad but, what about her feelings? Aren't you a bit curious to know what she thinks? Here she'll tell you. I don't own PJO/HO, it belongs to Riordan. Rated T for language, contains minor HOH spoils.


**Contains minor HOH spoils.**

Oh me. Poor me. Everyone sees me as the mean one, the bad one, but wouldn't you want revenge after being thousands and thousands of years watching your grandchildren rule the world?

At first I was nice and caring, but eventually I got tired of waiting to someone to notice me. So I sent my son Cronus to rule Olympus again but he failed, that demigod killed him. I hate demigods, children of gods and... mortals!? That's so low.

And this demigod, Perseus Jackson, son of... son of... P-Po, I can't even say it! Son of P-Po-Poseidon! That son of Poseidon killed my gorgeous son, Cronus. So now I'm going to take my revenge, I'm rising again and everyone thinks I'm bad, but I only want revenge. I can't stand seeing my grandchildren ruling the world, I have to do that. And my great grandchildren helping my grandchildren, no I can't bear it.

One of them even called me dirt face! Now, if you are a simple mortal thinking none of this is true, well, keep your eyes open because something big is going to happen. People will remember me!

They are always, oh yeah, Cronus killed his father Uranus and then Zeus did the same to him. The twelve Olympians this, the twelve Olympians that, the gods, the demigods, Tartarus, they even now Tartarus! But what about Gaea? Poor old Gaea? Nothing, not a single word! But that's going to change.

My son failed because of Perseus Jackson but now he's out of my way, he's down in Tartarus alone and... Wait, what? He's not alone? He's with Annabeth Chase? well, he's down in Tartarus with Annabeth Chase and... What now? HE'S OUT? THEY SURVIVED? *starts hyperventilating* relax Gaea, relax. Remember what your therapist told you before you killed him.

Now, well. Maybe it's a good thing they are out, my giants can kill them and give me their blood to rise, after all they are the most powerful demigods I've ever met. Defeated Cronus? Bah, please, he's a wimp. Survived Tartarus? Well, that's a bit big. But they won't survive me! I'll kill them and everyone that disrespected me.

WHAT THE F*CK ARE YOU TELLING ME? ROMANS AND GREEKS UNITED? THAT CAN'T BE TRUE! THEY HATE EACH OTHER. IT WAS HERA? MY GRANDDAUGHTER? AND I THOUGHT SHE WAS THE ONLY ONE GOOD. NOW NO ONE WILL SURVIVE TO GAEA'S WRATH, NO ONE.

Sorry about that, my new therapist says it's because of the lack of attention I get, I don't know.

But remember that if you want to survive you have to be careful, huh? Maybe join me and my army? My sons, the giants are very good fighters.

Now, now. Can someone tell me how those demigods survived Tartarus? WHAT? DAMASEN HELPED THEM? AND IAPETUS TOO? BUT HE SAYS HE'S BOB? WHAT? ARGH. As you may have noticed I have some... minor anger issues and, I can't believe my sons betrayed me *cries a sea* nooo, they couldn't have! my babies! they have all grown up now and they are taking their own decisions. My little babies *cries another sea*

Sorry, it's possible that I also have depression but *sniff*, I can't believe they are so big! I remember when they were only a hundred years old and needed help to do their homework. Here's an album, want to see it? *goes and grabs album from nowhere* here is Uranus changing Helios' diapers, and here I'm helping one of my giants with their homework. They were so cute!

As I'm probably boring you, I'll tell you about my battle plans.

The Greeks and Romans go to Greece all like, let's kill Gaea and save the word! Yeah! Cause it's that easy! Yeah!, and my monsters will grab them and kill everyone except for Annabeth Chase and Perseus Jackson. When they have them, the monsters will take the demigods to the mount I'll be rising - still didn't choose which one, it depends, I want it to have white floors and... no! white floors no because the blood will make them red... - see! too much to think about, the floors, the walls, whether it has big columns or small columns. And besides that I have a whole army under my power spread in Europe and the USA.

And there's also the gods and demigods to keep an eye one and mortals! Oh mortals! You have to be careful because if you are angry you can't just go and kill them with an earthquake or something. You can't because it goes "against the law" stupid laws.

*sighs* as you may have noticed I'm a really busy goddess so don't even ask me how I do to be so busy and keep this amazing and beautiful shape. But if you want I can tell you my little secret, I have surgeries. Before Apollo made them but then he turned against me so I have to exercise, it's not that bad. Going running every morning, not that bad, but remember this stays between us, huh?

But if you spill something and wake up underground, don't be too surprised. I have to go plan more ways of killing people so.

Gaea out! Have a nice and warm death :)

* * *

**I had this idea and thought, why not? It's funny. I beware you that it's a one shot but it was really funny to write. **

**fangirling bc of you **


End file.
